Farmer Fun 2
March 30, 2001
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The Birds and Bees A man was helping one of his cows give birth, when he noticed his 4-year-old son standing wide-eyed at the fence, soaking in the whole event. The man thought, "Great, he's 4 and I'm gonna have to start explaining the birds and bees. No need to jump the gun, I'll just let him ask, and I'll answer." After everything was over, the man walked over to his son and said, "Well son, do you have any questions?" "Just one," gasped the still wide-eyed lad. "How fast was that calf going when he hit that cow?"
The Exam Two football players, Bubba and Tiny, were taking an important exam. If they failed, they would be on academic probation and not allowed to play in the big game the following week. The exam was "fill in the blank" and the last question read, "Old MacDonald had a_____." Bubba was stumped -- he had no idea what to answer, but he knew he needed to get this one right to be sure he passed. Making sure the professor wasn't watching, he tapped Tiny in the shoulder. "Tiny, what's the answer to the last question?" Tiny laughed, then looked around to make sure the professor hadn't noticed. He turned to Bubba and said, "Bubba, you're so stupid. Everyone knows that Old MacDonald had a FARM." "Oh yeah," said Bubba, "I remember now." he picked up his No. 2 pencil and started to write the answer in the blank. Then he stopped. Tapping Tiny on the shoulder, he whispered, "Tiny, how do you spell farm?" "You are really dumb, Bubba. That's so easy," hissed Tiny, "farm is spelled 'E-I-E-I-O'."
A Wet Wish Three guys, an Iowan, a Wisconsinite and a Minnesotan are out walking along the beach together one day. They come across a lantern and a genie pops out of it. "I will give you each one wish, " says the genie. The Iowan says, "I am a farmer, my dad was a farmer, and my son will also farm. I want the land to be forever fertile in Iowa." With a blink of the genie's eye, 'FOOM'-- the land in Iowa was forever made fertile for farming. The Wisconsinite was amazed, so he said, "I want a wall around Wisconsin, so that no one can come into our precious state. Again, with a blink of the Genie's eye, 'POOF'-- there was a huge wall around Wisconsin. The Minnesotan asks, "I'm very curious. Please tell me more about this wall. The Genie explains, "Well, it's about 150 feet high, 50 feet thick and nothing can get in or out." The Minnesotan says, "Fill it up with water."
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