Palm Beach Jokes
Sent in by my Dad...Thanks!!!
December 18, 2000
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Why do Palm Beach Floridians have T.G.I.F. written on
their shoes? Toes Go In First.
Three Palm Beach Floridians were driving to Disneyland. After being in the car for four hours they finally saw a sign that said "Disneyland "Left," So they turned around and went home.
Why did the Palm Beach Floridian stare at the can of frozen orange juice? Because it said Concentrate.
Why can't Palm Beach Floridians dial 911? They can't find the 11 on the phone!
Two Palm Beach Floridians were standing on either side of a road. One asked the other. "How do I get to the other side?" The other replied, "Stupid, you're already ON the other side!"
Hear about the Palm Beach Floridian that got an AM radio? It took her a month to realize she could play it at night.
What happened to the Palm Beach Floridian Ice Hockey Team? They drowned in Spring Training.
What did the Palm Beach Floridian say when she saw the sign in front of the YMCA? "Look! They spelled MACY'S wrong!"
How do you make a Palm Beach Floridian laugh on Saturday? Tell them a joke on Wednesday.
Ok, enough picking on Floridians.... I wonder where this next guy is from??...hmmm?
WHAT A DUCKHEAD! A man took his old duck to the Doctor, concerned because the duck wouldn't eat. The Doctor explained to the man that as ducks age their upper bills grow down over their lower bills and make it difficult for the animal to pick up it's food. "What you need to do is gently file the upper bill down even with the lower bill. But you must be extra careful because the duck's nostrils are located in the upper bill and if you file down too far, when the duck takes a drink of water it'll drown." The man goes about his business and about a week later the Doctor runs into his patient. "Well, how is that duck of yours?" the Doctor inquires. "He's dead." declared the heartbroken man. "I told you not to file his upper bill down too far! He took a drink of water and drowned didn't he?" insisted the Doctor. "No." lamented the man. "I think he was dead before I took him out of the vise."
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