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Friday Funnies 5
January 11, 2002

Smart as a Brick

While a friend and I were visiting Annapolis, we noticed several students on their hands and knees assessing the courtyard with pencils and clipboards in hand.

"What are they doing?" I asked our tour guide.

"Each year," he replied with a grin, "The upperclassmen ask the freshmen how many bricks it took to finish this courtyard."

"So what's the answer?" my friend asked him when we were out of earshot of the freshmen.

The guide replied simply, "One."


Speed Trap

A police officer in a small town stopped a motorist who was speeding down Main Street.

"But officer," the man said, "I can explain..."

"Just be quiet," snapped the policeman, "or I'm going to let you cool off in jail until the chief gets back!"

"But officer, I just wanted to say...."

"And I said keep quiet! Now you're going to jail!"

A few hours later, the officer checked up on his prisoner and said, "Luckily for you, the chief's at his daughter's wedding. He'll be in a good mood when he gets back."

"Don't count on it," said the man in the cell. "I'm the groom."


Pickles?

A man was riding on a crowded bus, standing room only. The bus stopped and an elderly lady got on carrying a large picnic basket. She stood right in front of the man and grabbed the overhead rail so the picnic basket was above the man's head.

Being a gentleman, he offered his seat to her. She quickly declined as she was only going a short distance. Soon the picnic basket began to leak. The man felt something drop on top of his head. As he looked up it hit beside his nose and ran down across his lips. He tasted it, looked up at the lady and asked, "Pickles?"

She replied, "No...puppies."


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