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PARACHUTE PROBLEMS

Because of a plane malfunction, an English gentleman had to use his parachute. While the other passengers' chutes were opening, he kept pulling and pulling on his ripcord, all to no avail.

Finally, as he's plummeting down to Earth, he sees someone flying in the opposite direction.

"Pardon me, old chap," said the Brit, "Do you know anything about parachutes?"

The fellow flying past responded with, "No...do you know anything about gas stoves?!"