How to speak Southern A-F
February 1, 2001
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Please note that this piece only has fun with an accent, it's not a
wholesale
condemnation or mockery of a people group, it's all in fun... Y'all member that while yer laughin. Ah: The thing you see with, and the personal pronoun used denoting individuality. "Ah think Ah've got somethin' in mah ah." Aig: which come first, the chicken or the aig? Amulance: Ambulance, a vehicle that takes you to a hospital when you crash your neck car. Arn: an electrical instrument used to remove wrinkles from clothing Ast: To interrogate or inquire, as when a revenue agent seeks information about illegal moonshine stills. "Don't ast me so many question. I makes me mad." Attair: Contradiction used to indicate the specific item desire. "Pass me attair gravy, please" Awl: An amber fluid used to lubricate engines. "Ah like attair car, but it sure does take a lot of awl." Bawl: What water does at 212 degrees Fahrenheit. "That gal cain't even bawl water without burnin' it." Bidness: commercial enterprise Bleeve: Expression of intent or faith. "Ah bleeve we ought to go to church this Sunday." Bobbycue: a delectable southern sandwich of chopped pork, cole slaw an a fiery sauce Cent: Plural of cent. "You paid five dollars for that necktie? Ah wouldn't give fiddy cent for it." Clinics: a tissue Co-cola: The soft drink that started in Atlanta and conquered the world. "Ah hear they even sell Co-cola in Russia." Crine: weeping Cyst: To render aid. "Can Ah cyst you with those packages, ma'am." Daints: a more or less formal event in which members of the opposite sex hold each other and move rhythmically to the sound of music Dawfins: name of the pro football team in Miami Doc: a condition caused by an absence of light Earl: What you lube parts with or fry in. Ever: each, as in "She's bin crine ever day since JJ run off." Everwhichways: To be scattered in all directions. "You should have been there when the train hit attair chicken truck. Them chickens flew everwhichways. Far: A state of combustion that produces heat and light. "Ah reckon it's about time to put out the far and call in the dawgs." Flars: The colorful, sweet-smelling part of a plant. "If yo wife's mad at ya, it's smart to take her some flars."
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